I was a bathroom traffic regulation specialist. 5 out of 12 children have graduated from diapers (wahoo!) so what's that look like. 5 out of 12 children have to use the potty in the 15 minute transition from lunch to nap. And their new favorite thing? "I have to poop!" and they're all lil girls. I have never known lil girls to be so fascinated with BM. They want to see each others, they all gather around the potty to wave it bye-bye as it flushes. But seriously, we've got 5 girls who all need to go potty. That means I give you a few minutes, if its not flowin, you can try again later.
I was a personal body guard. Yes a full moon is on Friday. Apparantly my lil kiddos are celebrating in full force. No it's not funny to hit your friend with a toy. or wrestle them to the ground. or climb them like a ladder to reach something high. or throw clay at them.
I was a probation officer. Following the actions of above. Many conversations went like this- do you feel like you're ready to be safe with your friend? Let's try again.
I was a ninja. I would like to meet the person who decided which sink to install in my classroom. You really thought a movable faucet would be a great idea in toddler room. Really. Really? You never considered the possibility that toddlers are inquisitive. You never considered the possibility that said toddler might move the faucet (that you chose) so that it no longer is over the sink. Rather, it is now over the counter (or ground, or a friend) and turn on the water. Just to see what will happen. I shake my first at you. My ninja skills and quick reaction time left a mess that was cleaned up by one old beach towel instead of 3. Yes I consider that a victory.
I was a performing artist. Sitting in my box Loving this book right now. I get to act like a grumpy lion, an old elephant, a muddy hippo and a pesky lil flee. Said performing artist charmed the hearts of toddlers all across the land (or at least in the classroom) AND kept them in one corner, occupied for the 20 min it took to clean up from snack. Crumbly biscuits and jelly combine to form a truly nasty sticky paste. Again, who chose this?
I was a security operative. No, you may not knock his tower down. Let's build one just for you that you CAN knock down. This one right here, this is yours. No, not that one, this one. The one right in front of you. This one!
And even on the crappiest of days (see 2 rebellious nappers and 3 who didn't sleep more than 1 hour) the big hugs I get at the end all make up for it. And comments like...oh I should bring you some maker's mark tomorrow. Yes, yes you should.
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